Friday, 16 July 2010

"Do me a favour"

July 16th 2010.8am-4pm

This first communication of the day was,"you're not down to work today mate" from the Algerian.

However,the king's assistant told me i was working because the actor and fake anglo Indian accent had called in ill.
Bollywood was present at this early hour of the day and she was quite bouncy but then started yawning.Within minutes i was transferred to the small unit and the cockney scrubber observed that i was upset with that decision.

I was greeted by slow boy and the Asian DJ/producer who i trained last week.
This boy is a character.I will start with the fact he has sired 3 kids by 2 different mother's and he is only 21.I was pleased to hear that he sees the kids regularly and keeps in contact with the mother's.Also one of them has had breast implants.

I gave him a pep talk about playing the "game" with the punters but he knows the score already and its only his 3rd shift.

An attractive young blonde arrived at the front and requested a packet of menthol cigarettes,"Did you know menthol cigarettes lower a man's sperm count" he began.
She was initially shocked at this comment but they both giggled and he smiled at me when she left the unit.

The "can you do me a favour" line has worn off on me.Even though we are all paid to do a job i found myself asking slow boy to do me a favour on 4 seperate occasions.
They all invloved heavy manual work because i don't want another neck spasm.Also he hates working on the tills because he may have to use his brain.As far he's concerned he would rather be out on the floor or in the store doing the dirty work.
His 3 month probation expires next week and i wonder whether they will keep him on.

The DJ then started groping in his pocket for a mobile which was on silent.That is the ultimate betrayal,carrying a mobile on your person.As bold as brass he took the call whilst manouevering himself out of the unit.He was even speaking on the phone in full view of the punters.Slow boy saw it and ushered him out of the danger zone.If any of the management had seen him he may have been fired.

The alleged reason for the call was that yesterday he moved into a new flat in Islington and after signing the contract realised the place was riddled with damp.
"Were you stoned when you signed the contract?" i asked
"No,i just didn't see the damp when the builders were refurbishing the flat" he replied.

I dined on a home cooked lunch comprising chicken breast and jasmine rice but forgot any sauce so it was very dry.

Unfortunately,the slim Indian cricketer decided i would spend the rest of my shift on my own looking after the baby unit.This unit has mainly English punters who are so boring they never enagage.The women are dressed so poorly and the men have no personality.
There was no-one of note to talk to and it was a very boring afternoon.

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