Wednesday, 28 July 2010


Wednesday 28th July 2010.6am - 2pm

Chaotic scenes this morning.Due to the shortage of bodies one of the units couldn't open on time.

There is a middle aged woman from head office who undertakes random checks to ensure the business is functioning properly.She wasn't pleased when the unit in question opened late.The Algerian bore the brunt of her anger and for the first time he had a resigned look on his face.The look of someone who is unhappy but can't find a way out.

The first 2 hours are always very busy with all the first train punters hoovering up newspapers and chewing gum.One of the pet hates of the employees is when an irate punter gets so fed up with the queues they slap the money on the counter and walk out with their paper.This means we can't scan in the newspapers which has far reaching consequences when the returns take place.

However,i learnt something from the French queen today.He uses the money from papers to set up fake TPS purchases.So if someone leaves £2 on the counter and walks out that is 2 TPS sales which will go down nicely on the league tables.

I was relieved at 10am by the Albino Algerian with the facial tick and sent to the big unit where i was welcomed by the Cockney scrubber.En route to the big unit i attempted to wheel 2 huge cages through the concourse at the same time.I pretended i was Nigel Mansell again and made it safely.

Wednesdays is book day so the Cockney scrubber is obsessed.I took my usual berth on the tills and when it became too busy for me i would shout for help from my new best friend,the Cockney scrubber.She is all nervous energy and makes lots of basic mistakes.She couldn't work out half of £11 so i told her and she blamed it on tiredness,more like no grey matter.

Even though the King is still on annual leave i saw him pop in for a short while today wearing stonewash jeans and a beige creased shirt.How pathetic is that? Coming into work on his holiday.Maybe his assistant had a probelm she couldn't deal with.

There is a new woman in the cash office and she has a weight problem.I felt sorry for her because the rotweiller and the other 2 who work in the cash office are on leave at the same time which means she has been thrown to the wolves but she held it all together quite well.

I am starting to make friends with the Boots crew who wear white tops with blue braiding.One of them appears to be Eastern Bloc and the other one is Scottish who likes Sudoku books.Neither of them are oil paintings but pleasant introverted individuals.

The combination of the early starts and the relentless pace of the job are exhausting.I haven't worked these hours since i was a commis waiter at the Herman Goring back in the early 90's and i was a lot younger.I admire the guys who work these early shifts 5 days a week and have done it for years.The physical scars are plain to see,symptoms are bloodshot eyes,jaded facial skin and well worn hands.

The day flew by.Rasta boy's mum is following the diary and apparently likes it.

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